Such Excitement - Solo - A Star Wars Story.

I gave up going to see Star Wars  movies a long long time ago, although that was in  this galaxy and not one that was far far away. I enjoyed the first three, which then, confusingly became 4,5 and 6. When the prequels started coming along many years later our children were the right age to want to see them and so we went, although I have to say that the franchise lost me, along with many others, at Jar Jar Binks. An inability to distinguish the female characters and the actresses who played them, and  an entrenched belief that Hayden Christensen could not act his way out of a paper bag should his life depend upon it, sped my determination never to pay good money to see a Star Wars film  ever again.

I've manged to stick to that, helped by the  fact that previous new SW films have been released in December, meaning they hit Orkney around about the time that Son No 2, an avid fan, came home for Christmas. This meant I got an evening to myself at home while Son no 2 and the OH went off to enjoy their annual Star Wars fix. 

Until this year, when Solo hit the screens in the early summer; to whit, it is showing in Kirkwall now and the earliest we can expect to see Son No 2, involved as he is in rehearsals for Scottish Opera's community Pagliacci, is early August. The OH really really wanted to see the film. I suggested he go on is own. (Why not? I'd be quite happy to go and see a film on my own if it was something he didn't want to see. It seems that going to the cinema, like going swimming, is in some people's minds something you don't do on your own'. Extraordinary.

Anyway the inevitable happened and I was guilt tripped into saying I would go. This was a huge concession on my part as I did not anticipate any enjoyment whatsoever from the experience, but I was willing to sacrifice about eight quid and two and a half ours of my time to make him happy. 

I knew it was a mistake.

The film, like so many these days, was too long and too noisy and with far too many places where the sound quality was so abysmal you needed subtitles to know what the actors were saying. In addition to that, it was very violent, the battle scenes were confused, the plot was infantile, and  so predictable, and Emilia Clarke, despite many years of experience in the profession, can still not act. All the old Star Wars cliché's were there; the miraculous escapes, the special effects set pieces that go on for too long, the 'car' cases, the bar/cantina scenes with reptilian/humanoid cross aliens, the alien languages that are nothing more than a series of grunts, the lovable androids, the - well need I go on?

There may have been an interesting bit, I cannot swear there was not because I did actually fall asleep for about 10 minutes I was so bored, and possibly therefore missed the best ten minutes of the film. But somehow I doubt it.

And just to make my  joy complete, the OH didn't enjoy it either. All for noting then! or possibly a lesson learned.