On Hold

I have made passing references here in the past to the state of my eyesight, and no doubt there have been a fair few uncaught typos which might have alerted the reader to the fact that All Was Not Well in that department. I need a new lens in my left eye and I need an adjustment making to do with the new lens that went into my right eye a couple of years ago, and really reading and writing, as well as a lot of other things just to do with everyday life, have become increasingly difficult. 

The thing most affected by this was my Ph D. I had hoped to battle on and get it finished in February which was my submission date but it has become clear that that  is no longer possible. My sight plateaus for a while then has  a sudden lurch downwards, and the most recent lurch has left me confronting the fact that it is no longer sensible to try to carry on. It is frustrating, and I could go on for paragraphs about it, but I'm not going to. 

I have applied for a twelve month suspension of my study period and although I thought I'd be heart broken actually I'm just relieved, which I think is a measure of how much this really is the right decision. 

It also gives me a year to try out what life is like without the Ph D to think about. I've always rather dreaded the 'after the Ph D' period because I wasn't sure how I would cope without that framework and without the satisfaction of study, but now I get a year's rehearsal. 

I have a few plans for things that will keep me busy that don't rely on good vision - and thank goodness for kindle, where you can make the font bigger,  and audible,  and large stocks of wool for knitting. I am very frustrated that I am still months away from a consultation with the surgeon despite being referred to him in August, but as there is nothing I can do I shall just wait, pass the time as constructively as I can, and practice patience.